To unite our cause, I wrote us a fight song. It is to the tune of “Anchors Aweigh,” the U.S. Navy fight song and march.

Rise, good Ephs far and near — don’t stand idly by!
Free agency’s at risk and soon it well may die – ie – ie – ie;
Clusters will take its place, much to our dismay!
So stand up and raise your voice and write with us and fight with us today.

In his first speech to us, Morty once did say
That best was not good enough; so much to our dismay – ay – ay —
He said to the CUL, housing to review;
They thought up this cluster thing which is so bad, it makes us mad and blue.

There’s little time for us, and so much to be done!
Frosh, seniors, jocks, alumni — we need every one – un – un – un;
Write letters, tell your friends, give it your all:
For if anchors come to pass, you’ll lose your choice, forevermore, this fall.

Do try singing it to yourself. I recommend it highly.

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