College Confidential makes me laugh.

I hear that the caterpillars have been caught engaging in serious binge drinking..

In fact, preliminary results from a Hopkins Hall survey indicates that, in the last week, 75 percent of catepillars have ingested 5 or more thimble fulls of pesticide in one sitting. Among athlete caterpillars (those that dangle from trees), nearly 97 percent have ingested 5 or more thimble fulls of pesticide in one sitting, and an astonishing 50 percent reported intoxication levels so high that they were unable to emerge from their cacoons.

Frankly, I’m appalled by these statistics. What do you think needs to be done?

I’m mostly concerned that the caterpillars seem to self-segregate and form their own culture. I think they should be merged into the new clusters.

Ha!

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