How is it that the birthdays of two of the most revered Presidents of the United States, Washington and Lincoln, are now paired to give us a three day holiday?

The birthdays used to be celebrated separately on the 12th (Lincoln) and the 22nd (Washington). Of course this was in the olden days before the Uniform Holidays Act of 1968 when cars had fins and mothers took valium and kids got two week days off from school, one for each. So George and Abe became the same date on the third Monday of February. Some say we recognize just George, some say George and Abe.

But which ever or both you hold in your mind, the day is still a retail jamboree. “Stack ’em high, price ’em low, move ’em out”, those are the words rather than “Happiness and moral duty are inseparably connected ” (George) or “A house divided against itself cannot stand” (Abe).

Well I have a suggestion. If what we need is a three day weekend and a chance for merchants to clear out that unsold merchandise, lets make it the second Monday of January. And we can honor Andrew Johnson (December 29) and Millard Fillmore (January 7). Now, according to US News and World Reports‘ list of the 10 Worst Presidents, they are 3rd and 5th. Not too bad … and you know Ephs respect USN&WR for the quality and thoughtfulness of its’ listings. We can call it Presidents-to-Go Day. And we can think about others on the list.

Don’t get me started on July 6th.

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